Father’s journey culminates in book, fund for infant loss support – Sept. 14 event to benefit the The Charles Martin Corvi Fund

by Mary McKenna

When death strikes prematurely and claims the life of the too-young-to-die, the loss can feel disordered and senseless. One local father, who’s had to grapple with his share of tragic consequences in the untimely death of his infant son, Charlie, reflects on the experience, calling it “all very hard and complicated.”

On Oct. 26, 2021, Hudson residents David Corvi and his wife, Katherine, who was almost 38 weeks pregnant with their third child at the time, faced the devastating reality of a stillborn son.

“Charlie died from a true knot in his umbilical cord. The shock and the surprise was that nothing was wrong developmentally. This was a textbook accident,” David said. “It was heart-wrenching.”

Despite all their preparations for their baby’s arrival, the couple felt completely unprepared for the grief of his loss. Desperate for support, they turned to child life specialists at Hillcrest Hospital, where Charlie was delivered, to help them break the news to Charlie’s brothers, who were eagerly awaiting his arrival at home.

Grieving Charlie’s death, both individually and as a family, has looked different for each of them. David said that his initial approach – to more or less muscle through, keep the pain to himself and “be tough” for his wife and kids – was a “typical male response.” 

The Rev. Cyril Pinchak, a long-term friend and Catholic priest who attended high school with David at Gilmour Academy and baptized Charlie at the hospital, offered a new perspective.

“He said we are a community of people. We need to share our stories. He cautioned me not to close myself off and to let people in,” said David.

David took his friend’s words to heart and began the process of “leaning in to his wife and two living boys,” he recounted. Other outlets like physical activity – skating on the ice at Gilmour, where he worked as a coach – and especially writing about his experience were particularly helpful to him following Charlie’s death.

“I was always a writer,” David recalled. When Katherine was pregnant with their first son, William, David shared that he was inspired to write William letters intended as gifts for “later dates or life milestones.” Naturally, this tradition continued with the birth of his second son, Alexander, and to this day, a collection of letters awaits the two boys.  

“I didn’t write any letters to Charlie while my wife was pregnant with him because we were busy with life with two kids,” David explained.

It was Katherine who first nudged him to consider revisiting his old habit of correspondence, even in his late son’s absence. “Did you think about writing any letters to Charlie?” she asked. “It might help.”

And so began a series of letters to the son who would never grow up to read them. Initially meant for Charlie, the letters proved instrumental in helping David process his grief. By spring of 2022, with eight of them written, it occurred to David that his correspondence might benefit others, particularly grieving fathers, he said. He realized that by refining the letters to be more “public facing” and finding a way to publish them, he could reach a wider audience.  

David began by making an appearance on his cousin’s parenting podcast, Mothern, where he shared Charlie’s story, talked about navigating grief and parenting after loss, and read one of his letters to listeners in an episode called “Dear Charlie.”  

 “You don’t hear a lot from the father’s perspective about grieving,” he said, adding that this seemed to be particularly true with pregnancy and infant loss, where more support resources are directed towards the mothers.

The podcast opened new doors of communication for that. David began making connections with other parents and grandparents in the infant loss community. He discovered he wasn’t alone – a message his good friend Penchak had first relayed in those early days of his grief, and one David knew he needed to share with others.

Working with the Igniting Souls Publishing Group to create his book, “Dear Charlie… Letters to My Son: A Father’s Journey of Loss, Grief, and Remembrance,” David shares his story. The book, slated for release on Aug. 30 and available through Amazon, is something David hopes will be a resource for other grieving fathers out there.

David said he hopes fathers who read the book will hear the message that they are not alone and that they don’t have to be the “strong” and “emotionless” one.

“If it’s sticking to your golf league, or going to work out, or talking to your wife, or writing, or walking – there are things you can do to experience your grief,” he said.

The Corvis said they felt “blessed and privileged” to have such a strong network of family and friends. Whether it was coming together for Charlie’s funeral, or a marathon run in his memory, or a grief camp for their boys, all of it was incredibly helpful, observed David.

Helping families recover from similar tragedies is “the heart” and driving force behind a donor advised fund the family opened in Charlie’s name with the help of Amy Jordan at the Hudson Community Foundation, he said.

“Amy was great to work with and told us all about donor advised funds. The fact that HCF is right here, and I can ride my bike down there and walk in, and Amy’s there to help, it’s just perfect,” David said, calling it another one of those “Charlie winks” he references in his book as moments that unfold like a gift from his late son. 

With the help of the foundation, contributions to Charlie’s fund are used to partner with healthcare systems and nonprofit organizations to support families who have experienced the loss of a newborn due to stillbirth or other related traumas during birth or immediately thereafter.

“Stillbirth is more common than people know,” said David. “The statistic is that around 21,000 babies die of stillbirth every year.”

On Sept. 14, the Corvis will once again host “Charlie’s Challenge,” a walk, run or bike ride – participant’s choice – on the Ohio-Erie Canal Towpath trail to raise money for the fund. The event starts at 9 a.m. at the Station Road Bridge Trailhead in Brecksville. For more information, visit charlesmartincorvi.org/challenge2024. 

“We all have stories,” David said. “Charlie is not here to physically live out his story, so we are helping him continue to do that through his fund, his challenge and this book – and all the little things that keep his memory alive.”

To donate to Charlie’s fund, visit charlesmartincorvi.org/donate.  ∞

David Corvi lost his son Charlie to stillbirth
in 2021. Through a support fund,
recently published book and upcoming
fundraiser, he is keeping Charlie’s story
alive. Photo submitted.

On our cover (photo): For the third consecutive year, David and Katherine Corvi and their boys will host “Charlie’s Challenge” this month. This
year’s challenge is a trek – on foot or bike – on the Ohio-Erie Canal Towpath Trail. It will again raise money for a fund that assists nonprofit and healthcare organizations in their work to support families who’ve experienced pregnancy or infant loss. The fund honors the Corvi’s stillborn son, Charlie. Photo submitted.